Today's CIY leads me further into softening my heart. It gives me more understanding, too, relating to the question I posted the other day in the Catechism in a Year Facebook group about the band-aid (mentioned in day 216).
“Whoever denigrates marriage also diminishes the glory of virginity. Whoever praises it makes virginity more admirable and resplendent. What appears good only in comparison with evil would not be truly good. The most excellent good is something even better than what is admitted to be good.”[119] —St. John Chrysostom
To take that a little further, here's an excerpt from Christopher West's "Theology of the Body for Beginners":
"By abstaining from sexual union, celibates demonstrate the great value of sexual union. How so? A sacrifice only has value to the degree that the thing sacrificed has value."
(Read that again.) Lol I hate when people say, "Read that again". It seems so rude, but it's worth doing in this case!
To say that giving up something shows its value may seem paradoxical, but what good is giving up kale for lent if you don't like kale? There would be no value in that. Since sex is SO GOOD, it means a lot more when it is sacrificed for something that is even MORE GOOD. Giving something up, like sexual union, shows its value.
I get it. It can be a hard pill to swallow because of my own weakness and attachments, as I was one of those who would think, "How could someone be happy without a sexual relationship?". It's still hard to understand fully in my heart, to be honest, but it's not my calling to sacrifice in that way. I think if someone CAN do that... Wow. What a gift to be able to give. It's also the reason why marriage is not an answer necessarily for priests. It is a choice to be entered into, not a punishment. Assuming they are in the priesthood for the right reasons and not to escape something in their lives or run from inadequacies or to stifle perversions (which would only crop up again later anyway) —assuming they are receiving it with joy and love, this is the highest form of sincere self-gift. It is the fruitful living out of the redemption of sexual desire.
Here's a helpful prayer from chapter 5 of West's book:
"Dear God, whether you call us to marriage or celibacy, help us to give ourselves wholly to you first of all, and then to each other as a self-gift. Teach us how to direct our erotic desires according to your design so we are aimed at our true destiny—eternal union with you. Amen.”
Attached below are some more beautiful quotes I highlighted in Christopher West’s TOB for Beginners.
I implore everyone to read more about Theology of the Body. John Paul II’s examination of the Song of Songs and the talks he gave on human Love in God’s divine plan makes it clear how good marriage and sexual union really is and how important our bodies are in telling the story of God’s Love. With the way society is today, it’s now more important than ever to spread the message of TOB.
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