I've searched the eyes of man for love
In each and every one I saw Him
A beauty from above--
The brightest pieces of my soul, reflected
Intensely desiring a connection
a mystical union
that does not exist here on this plane
Skin whispering truth to skin
Wound me and I shudder--set my heart aflame
I came to know their suffering
and I knew their suffering all too well
Even wounded men who claimed to be holy
destroyed my spirit, took of my flesh
Spoke cruel profanities to my soul with a drunken breath
Opened wide my aching gaping heart
To be pierced by a hot spear of desecration
No human can truly know another's soul
We are so broken
We may find comfort in our brokenness
In the embrace of warm skin
We can pretend that we tell truth with our bodies
But who takes our tears into him?
Who can cradle our heads and wash us clean
With no intention of pushing inside, taking, wanting, erasing
To not pluck you from the earth but water you and feed you so that you grow
To delight in your fragrance and colors
Knowing that he already resides within you
Seeing himself bloom
He sees your light
Where is the truth?
Here I am, a hypocrite, an imposter, a sinner
I still think lies taste good
But they leave you hungry
For real nourishment
I still want my heart to be seen
I struggle because I know no man will see me
But God does
God knows our hearts
His lack of touch increases faith but makes one lonesome
If I had found love
Never truly suffered pain
Would I speak to Him at all
would I still cry out to the heavens
from the floor, on my back
Never hear His call?
It wasn't my destiny, so it seems.
or maybe it could change.
To cease to change is death, they say.
I'm on my knees
now in a different way
Am I in earnest or am I just a wounded child
My sacrifice, God sees. When no one else can.
May He touch us so deeply that we feel the expansion in our hearts
and shiver from the ecstatic passion of His sanctifying grace,
Holy sacrifice,
and pure love.
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